April brings hope and emergence.

Wow.

What a few months it's been.  These last *several* months, in fact, have been full of every emotion.  They have brought with them a bright-ass spotlight to shine on and call out the stuff that wasn't working for me but that, until this point, I hadn't been willing to see.  It's that stuff that you know brings you stress and anxiety, but that you tell yourself the story of it being fine, that you can make it work, that it's what is necessary for xyz, etc - you tell the story for so long that you begin to believe it, sort of, but you're still suffering because that story isn't actually true.  And you can feel it, and your higher self knows it...and then suddenly the light has been shone on it; it clicks; and you're suddenly in the place of just no longer being willing to allow it.  It's done. 

BUT, the healing process isn't done :-D.  Oh that can take awhile, but it's all good because once that decision to simply no longer be available for that old situation has been made within you, and it can happen in an instant, you're free and the healing begins.  Now, let me be clear, the healing and the seeing other things that need to be seen, that have been begging to be acknowledged for so long can bring some very choppy waters.  I encourage you to trust the boat you're in, and just ride the waves however they come.  Trust the upheaval, trust your ability to heal, and trust the timing of it all.  

I have stopped posting on social media for these last months (it wasn't a conscious choice until I started feeling guilty about it, and then I realized it was an invitation to let go of the stuff that I just didn't have the bandwidth or desire to do, and I happily accepted the invitation) and I even forgot to send you all a note last month.  When I realized it, there was this sense of having dropped the ball.  How could I have not been as perfectly consistent as I strive to be?  My higher self helped me realize real quick that it wasn't anything to spend energy stressing over.  

I was tempted to "say forget" it for this April newsletter as well, but then I realized that I have a knowing - one that has been showing itself every day for awhile now, that many of you (and certainly many out in the rest of the world, every day) are struggling with big things.  Like, different big things.  Not necessarily the big pandemic things that you've been dealing with over the last 3 years.  You're seeing, realizing, and experiencing new struggles and are being invited, and maybe even forced, to face certain fears. 

I will tell you this: as tempting as it is to hide from them and pretend they're not there, hoping they'll go away...it does you a huge disservice.  I know, hearing that doesn't necessarily help, but one thing I know to be true is that if you allow the fear to keep building strength, it just has complete power over you.  Who really wants for that to be the case?  Especially at a time when we are all claiming we want more freedom and autonomy, and want to reconnect with our own sense of power.  It starts here - within - facing those internal fears that have been controlling us from the inside.  And if that big light is shining on and bringing your attention to something within yourself - it's a signal that the time is now.  So trust that and open to the process.  It's messy, healing, and SO freeing!!

We will be ok!

In solidarity,

Emily

P.S.  What have you been doing to help yourself out during this rocky journey of yours?  I'd love to hear.  This is when it can be the most difficult - and the most impactful.