How to BE the change…

A theme that continues to come into my awareness while I’m working with clients is the irony between wanting to control everything (and even creating what some would call a “disorder” around needing control) in our lives…and the huge amount of control that we actually do have. But the catch is: where we have “control” is within ourselves. ‘Oh, well that’s too hard - forget it, then’ that inner critic might say.

What if instead of calling it “control”, we called it “choice”?

I remember sitting in a cafe beneath the yoga studio that was my ‘yoga home’ for a decade and on the big mirror of this cafe was the popular Ghandi quote, “Be the change you wish to see in the world”. And for a long time, I took that to mean I was to “be the change” while I was out in the world; in how I showed up with others.

Over time, I began to realize that “being the change” is about who you are being….to yourself, within yourself, when no one is watching, when there’s no expectation on the outcome.

I’ve found that the physical yoga practice (Asana) is one awesome tool for looking into this - of course there are others and I’d love to hear which tools might be helping you in a similar way:

When you’re in a pose and the teacher says to lift a certain limb, do you hear the words and understand internally what that might be a let yourself trust that you know what your limbs are and lift said limb? Or do you look around the room and seek the answer or the “right way” in what everyone else in the room is doing? Honestly think of what you tend to do and then ask yourself “where else in my life does this apply/show up for me?”.

When you’re in a pose and you’re feeling tight in that area and the teacher offers an option or modification to allow that pose to be more accessible and probably more beneficial to you, do you allow yourself to receive it and give it a try? Or do you forfeit the choice (that would actually serve you best)? Where else does this show up in your life? Where are you pushing yourself to be someone else? to need something that you don’t actually need? Where are you forfeiting choice?

Do you see it yet? How what is going on within us is directly related to what we’re seeing around us?

There are countless…COUNTLESS… examples of how we can gain so much insight about ourselves from practices like this that are designed to bring awareness of ourselves.

The beauty is that you can start NOW to choose awareness and choose to do it differently.

Some time ago, I heard someone talking about how we procrastinate to make changes like this and it’s simply because we have, one way or another, been conditioned to associate that choice with being unsafe. So, in the now, when you feel the urge to pause on something that you know is “for” you and something that you “want” to do, lean into it and recondition yourself to associate it with being safe. Let it become familiar and, therefore, less scary. THESE are the things you have the power to change. THIS is where your work lies.

I appreciate you and your journey so much. Keep going.

Love,

Emily